Who's an intellectual ?

Which of these definitions is most apt ?

1. Somebody who doesn't work in the software Industry
2. Somebody who's English educated
3. Somebody who's NOT English educated and thus is not influenced by the crappy Indian English media
4. Somebody who knows who's the current dictator in Burkina Faso
5. Somebody who keeps track of how many explosions have happened in Peshawar this month
6. Somebody whose lips don't move when he reads the newspaper
7. Somebody who doesn't read the Times of India
8. Somebody who reads Bharathiyar
9. Somebody who follows Cho in Thuglaq
10. Somebody who can say if an English Daily is pro-Congress or anti-Congress
11. Somebody who knows India experiences two monsoon sessions - the south west monsoon and the north east monsoon
12. Somebody who invests in the stock market
13. Somebody who doesn't invest in the stock market
14. Somebody who reads the edit section in The Hindu daily
15. Somebody who subscribes to The Frontline
16. Somebody who doesn't flip to the comics section the moment he picks up a newspaper
17. Somebody who doesn't know how many centuries Sachin Tendulkar has against his name
18. Somebody who doesn't know Prabhu Deva and Nayanthara are an item
19. Somebody who doesn't know when is SRK's birthday
20. Somebody who has to read the review of a new flick before deciding whether or not to watch it - on pirated DVD !
21. Somebody who can hold his own in an argument about whether or not India should import food grains
22. Somebody who says he doesn't want his son/daughter to become a software geek
23. Somebody who visits the US and is so enamoured of it that he settles down there permanently
24. Somebody who can afford to lunch at a four star restaurant but prefers the idlis at Veena Stores
25. Somebody who owns more pairs of Newport jeans than Wrangler
26. Somebody who solves the cryptic crossword puzzle in The Hindu
27. Somebody who does his Engineering at the IITs AND gets his management degree at the IIMs
28. Somebody who supports the RSS
29. Somebody who's a Tambram
30. Somebody who has an explanation for why Beta Brinjal is bad for India
31. Somebody who's against the big bad retail stores
32. Somebody who can understand why Outlook publishes Arundhati Roy's articles
33. Somebody who studied in English medium schools but prefers to send his son to a Kannada medium school
34. Somebody who thinks donation is a four letter word
35. Somebody who thinks donation is a four letter word and yet sends his son to a school which demands donation because this school is hep
36. Somebody who actually stops at red and moves only on green
37. Somebody who uses the word 'paradigm' when he gives a presentation to his boss and actually knows what it means
38. Somebody who thinks Chetan Bhagat is cool
39. Somebody who thinks he is an intellectual